Letter to a 4 month old

My dear darlin’ cuuutest 4 month old that I know :)))

Well, as luck goes, you are the ONLY four month old that I know which makes you the cutest by default (ha ha ha mommy is funny). That matter of sheer chance aside though, even if I did know other four month olds, you’d definitely come out tops, my dear, and THAT obviously is my completely unbiased opinion (ahem ahem).

Sooo here we are again! F O U R M O N T H S I T I S T H I S T I M E W O O H O O O ! Today is your fourth month birthday and, as I look at you while typing this, you are no longer the little alien thing that I brought home from the hospital. You look like an actual human baby now. I sit here in absolute awe that me and your father could create you. I don’t think I’d ever get over that amazement regardless of how much bigger and older you get. This cycle of life truly has left me humbled. You never realise how remarkable the process of creation of life is until you make one yourself, or adopt and care for a little reflection of yourself. I have to reiterate what a friend (who recently had a baby girl) said to me about his daughter: you are by far the biggest achievement of my life. No money, no career highs, no success as the world rates it can match up to the happiness that your smiles and chuckles give me. I am truly blessed, and for that, I thank you.

Just as much as I am amazed with the process of reproduction, I am equally fascinated with the truth that all babies are born with exactly the same wiring. All of them have to reach the same milestones – albeit at their own pace – but all of them go through the same rigour to reach the final target of being able to stand erect on their feet, being able to walk, being able to eat, and being able to grow cognitively to become what we know as a human adult. And still somehow, all of us end up being different than everyone else in the world. Each one of us is unique with our own peculiar traits, likes and dislikes different from everybody else in the human species. Fascinating stuff, isn’t it? So you too, my jalebi, are hitting the same textbook milestones that an average four month old baby does, and I can’t help but feel proud of you every time you accomplish something that you didn’t know the day before.

You grab anything and everything in reach now. Even the most mundane object like a plastic container excites you. And once the same container is out of sight, it does not exist for you. You explore it with renewed interest when I hand it back to you just a minute later. Ah How I adore you! You love eating your hands AND my hands too! You gnaw on them so hard that my fingers hurt after you’re through with slobbering all over them. You’ve also been eating your toes for a while now. So much so that I often joke to you to stop showing me your butt and move on to the next step of sitting and crawling already. Before that, of course, you’ve got to do that rolling over thing. From back to tummy. Even though medical science says that rolling over is the least reliable milestone there is, it’d be nice to see you tumbling around the house before you start waddling. You did roll over a few times (you did quite a few today, I gotta say) but only when you wanted to. Not when your parents wanted you to. Bah! Good. You are your mommy’s girl already. A mind of her own. I like it. Just so you know from the get go, I have an absolute “ja beta, jee le apni zindagi” attitude about this parenting gig. I would love for you to have an opinion on your likes and dislikes. I would love for you to be ambitious and pursue any path that you are passionate about. I would love for you to have a mind of your own and not let society dictate you into a way of life. I would love for you to always smile, always giggle, always chuckle as you do now when mommy hugs you and blows raspberries on your cheeks. :D

My baby, my sweetheart, my tastiest dessert, as I always say, please just stay as you are. I crib about your lack of naps. I whine about you not rolling over when I want you to. But I never acknowledge my luck for having been blessed with a baby as fantastic as you. Honest. I could’ve had an inconsolable crybaby who’d keep me up at nights but, no, I got so lucky with you and I need to acknowledge that. You are calm, playful, happy, giggly baby who is not at all hard to please. All you ever ask for is your food on time, and for your mommy’s and daddy’s attention to play with you. That sure isn’t too much to ask, baby, it sure isn’t. In return, you bless us with such happiness that it doesn’t seem fair. All we have to do is tickle your stomach, and you fill our hearts with your endearing laughter that is so addicting that we keep tickling you again and again just to hear you laugh. How is it fair? You give us way more than we can ever give you. I cannot stress enough on how blessed both me and your father are.

Before you, I was often told by elders in the family that I’d realize how difficult parenthood is when I have a child. I didn’t understand them then, and now that I have you, I still don’t understand what they meant. True that there are nights I wished I was sleeping instead of having to rock you to sleep. True that there have been days when I wanted to run away from home leaving you with your father and not come back for days. But despite all of that, you are exactly what both me and your father needed to make our lives worthwhile. In you, we’ve found the answer to the question that seemed so difficult to answer before you came along. In you, we’ve found the purpose of our lives. Amazing this process of evolution. It makes you want to create life, it makes you create life, it makes you fall in love with the life you create … just to keep our species growing and strong. That is the purpose of our life really. We were here for you, and now that  you are here, we will always be here for you. Our life begins and ends with your happiness.

It is in your smiles that we find joy as we never knew before. It is in your laughter that we find our laughter. It is in your inquisitiveness of the world around you that we find our childhood. It is in your cooing that we find words of unconditional love. It is in your cuddles that we find the warmth, the love, and the contentment of a life lived well. My dear child, may you always be happy and healthy. Grow, prosper, live on … and always remember that no matter where you are in the world and what stage of life you are in when you are reading this, there are always two people waiting for you at home whose hearts beat just for you. Don’t forget to pick up the phone and give them  a call. They are waiting to hear from you. Always. And if they are not available, please rest assured that they will always know that you are thinking of them. Close your eyes, and accept their love for you that will never lessen. Hugs, my angel. Lots of kisses too.

But of course

-your silly mama (and silly dad by default ;p)

(shall post photo later. baby needs to play with her favorite toy: ME ME ME haha)

Here we go:

oooooh I didn’t notice the middle finger until now!!! lol Well on track, mere laal (pun intended haha)!

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